1 00:00:05,381 --> 00:00:07,425 Oh, shit. 2 00:00:10,595 --> 00:00:11,929 I heard it. 3 00:00:13,097 --> 00:00:14,015 I'm sorry. 4 00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:17,101 What time is it? 5 00:00:17,185 --> 00:00:20,063 - It's five. - Oh, fuck. 6 00:00:20,146 --> 00:00:21,606 I didn't go to sleep till four. 7 00:00:21,689 --> 00:00:24,192 - I'm sorry. - Hey, come back to bed. 8 00:00:24,275 --> 00:00:25,860 - I can't. - What? 9 00:00:25,943 --> 00:00:28,071 I have an early class. 10 00:00:28,154 --> 00:00:30,406 If I don't go home first and wake Brady up, 11 00:00:30,490 --> 00:00:31,616 he'll sleep all day. 12 00:00:31,699 --> 00:00:34,202 Sleep all day. That sounds so good. 13 00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:37,455 Go to sleep. I'll be outta here in two minutes. 14 00:00:37,538 --> 00:00:38,414 Ow! 15 00:00:38,498 --> 00:00:39,874 Oh, my God. 16 00:00:39,957 --> 00:00:42,168 Shit. Sorry. 17 00:00:43,836 --> 00:00:44,921 Fuck. 18 00:01:10,279 --> 00:01:12,115 Morning, pumpkin! 19 00:01:12,949 --> 00:01:15,118 I got our pumpkin. 20 00:01:16,119 --> 00:01:17,412 And there's 21 00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:20,289 there's pancakes. 22 00:01:20,998 --> 00:01:23,084 Not pumpkin. Dropped the ball there. 23 00:01:23,167 --> 00:01:25,187 Mom, I told you, you don't have to come all the way over here 24 00:01:25,211 --> 00:01:26,772 every morning just to make me breakfast. 25 00:01:26,796 --> 00:01:28,798 I know, but I like it. 26 00:01:28,881 --> 00:01:30,883 And the two of you would starve if I didn't. 27 00:01:31,801 --> 00:01:35,555 Hey, so, after you eat, you wanna help me decorate the stoop? 28 00:01:36,305 --> 00:01:39,475 We can't be the only house on the block with no Halloween spirit. 29 00:01:39,558 --> 00:01:41,185 Isn't this house already scary enough? 30 00:01:47,358 --> 00:01:49,444 Charlotte is going to kill us 31 00:01:49,527 --> 00:01:52,363 for not wearing costumes to her fundraiser. 32 00:01:52,697 --> 00:01:54,031 I am wearing a costume. 33 00:01:54,949 --> 00:02:00,413 I'm Helen Gurley Brown, writer and founder of "Cosmopolitan" magazine, circa 1970. 34 00:02:01,914 --> 00:02:03,666 I just thought you were you. 35 00:02:03,750 --> 00:02:08,212 When have you ever seen me wear bows in my hair like this? 36 00:02:08,295 --> 00:02:10,298 I don't know. Wednesday? 37 00:02:11,883 --> 00:02:14,385 It's gonna be an early night for me. 38 00:02:14,469 --> 00:02:17,430 I've lost all my sleep in the Bermuda Schlepping Triangle 39 00:02:17,513 --> 00:02:20,141 between Che's apartment, Brooklyn, and Columbia, 40 00:02:20,224 --> 00:02:23,311 so I'm wrecked and in a terrible mood. 41 00:02:23,394 --> 00:02:24,794 Now see, you did come in a costume. 42 00:02:24,854 --> 00:02:27,648 - You came as a giant bummer. - Yeah. 43 00:02:27,732 --> 00:02:30,068 - Thank you so much for coming. - Thanks for having us. 44 00:02:31,194 --> 00:02:33,613 - Guys! - Hi! 45 00:02:33,696 --> 00:02:36,324 - It's a costume party! - I'm Helen Gurley Brown. 46 00:02:36,407 --> 00:02:39,619 I have seen you wear that dress before. It is not a costume. 47 00:02:39,702 --> 00:02:41,889 Charlotte, did you really think I was gonna come as Belle 48 00:02:41,913 --> 00:02:43,372 from "Beauty and the Beast"? 49 00:02:43,456 --> 00:02:45,416 I knew this would be an issue. 50 00:02:45,500 --> 00:02:47,001 - So... - Ooh... 51 00:02:47,585 --> 00:02:50,463 I've come as the comic disaster that is my life. 52 00:02:50,546 --> 00:02:52,358 For the record, you're not in a costume either. 53 00:02:52,382 --> 00:02:53,383 Yeah. 54 00:02:53,466 --> 00:02:55,468 Yes, I am! I'm Elizabeth Jennings. 55 00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,970 You know, from "The Americans." 56 00:02:58,054 --> 00:03:00,098 No, still think it's you. 57 00:03:00,181 --> 00:03:01,700 Okay, wait. You have to see us together. 58 00:03:01,724 --> 00:03:03,935 Harry! Honey, honey, come here. 59 00:03:05,645 --> 00:03:06,938 Okay, yes! 60 00:03:07,021 --> 00:03:10,691 Now we know it's not you 'cause Harry has hair. 61 00:03:10,775 --> 00:03:15,738 We are a husband and wife team of Russian spies in the '80s. 62 00:03:15,822 --> 00:03:19,409 I'm Keri Russell, and he is Matthew Rhys. 63 00:03:19,492 --> 00:03:23,121 See? I have smokey eye, hair on one side. 64 00:03:25,665 --> 00:03:27,458 Babe, how come nobody's gettin' this? 65 00:03:27,542 --> 00:03:29,061 I've no idea what you're talkin' about, 66 00:03:29,085 --> 00:03:30,878 but I am totally on board with Harry's hair. 67 00:03:30,962 --> 00:03:31,838 Right? 68 00:03:31,921 --> 00:03:34,006 Right? This is me in eighth grade! 69 00:03:50,606 --> 00:03:54,068 If one more foodie asks if I'm supposed to be Padma Lakshmi, 70 00:03:54,152 --> 00:03:56,529 I will file a class-action lawsuit. 71 00:03:56,612 --> 00:03:59,949 Okay, we have a winner. 72 00:04:00,491 --> 00:04:03,202 Thank you. Gettin' my little Eartha Kitt on. 73 00:04:03,286 --> 00:04:05,997 And for what? Not one fine man here. 74 00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:08,499 Sweetie, complete waste of Lycra. 75 00:04:08,583 --> 00:04:11,711 It's a charity event with all married men and dad bods. 76 00:04:11,794 --> 00:04:14,630 I saw a Captain Jack Sparrow over there. He's kinda hot. 77 00:04:14,714 --> 00:04:16,673 I saw him, too. He's a woman. 78 00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:18,050 Well, I need a man. 79 00:04:18,134 --> 00:04:19,494 And my free one-month subscription 80 00:04:19,552 --> 00:04:21,387 in Chocolate Singles only got me cyber-stalked 81 00:04:21,471 --> 00:04:23,181 by a white guy named Jeff. 82 00:04:23,264 --> 00:04:24,640 So, white chocolate? 83 00:04:24,724 --> 00:04:26,434 And we all know white chocolate isn't real. 84 00:04:26,517 --> 00:04:29,187 Fret not, I will take you to the place 85 00:04:29,270 --> 00:04:31,355 - to meet single men. - Which is? 86 00:04:31,439 --> 00:04:33,191 A sperm bank? A monastery? 87 00:04:33,274 --> 00:04:34,442 A Marvel movie? 88 00:04:34,525 --> 00:04:36,652 A five-star hotel bar. 89 00:04:36,736 --> 00:04:38,905 Super expensive rooms, so you know he has coin, 90 00:04:38,988 --> 00:04:41,532 and deadbeats aren't allowed to wander in off the street. 91 00:04:42,575 --> 00:04:45,995 So, what do you say, Carrie? Do we show this newbie the ropes? 92 00:04:46,746 --> 00:04:48,206 Yeah, sure. I'm in. 93 00:04:48,998 --> 00:04:50,166 You are? 94 00:04:51,542 --> 00:04:53,044 I'm kinda surprised. 95 00:04:53,127 --> 00:04:54,420 "I'm a mouse on the outside, 96 00:04:54,504 --> 00:04:57,507 but inside, I'm this tiger, and I have to get on with it." 97 00:04:57,590 --> 00:04:59,717 It's a quote from Helen Gurley Brown. 98 00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:10,978 I'm out. 99 00:05:11,604 --> 00:05:12,897 You finally made it! 100 00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:17,360 You are one lucky Frankenstein. 101 00:05:17,443 --> 00:05:18,653 Thanks. 102 00:05:19,612 --> 00:05:21,114 Why did I go through the trouble 103 00:05:21,197 --> 00:05:24,117 of renting you a very expensive George Washington outfit 104 00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:26,512 - and you don't even wear it? - Baby, this is a public event. 105 00:05:26,536 --> 00:05:29,414 I didn't wanna end up on Page Six in a powdered wig. 106 00:05:29,497 --> 00:05:32,500 Also, not great press optics, you dirty dancing with the Devil. 107 00:05:32,583 --> 00:05:33,750 Well, hon, he's gay. 108 00:05:33,835 --> 00:05:35,169 People don't know that. 109 00:05:35,962 --> 00:05:39,757 He knew the Left Eye, the T-Boz, and the Chilli parts verbatim. They know. 110 00:05:39,841 --> 00:05:41,926 Well, it wasn't very dignified. 111 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:45,263 And besides, this political run was your idea, remember? 112 00:05:45,346 --> 00:05:48,975 Well, it wasn't my idea for you to lose all sense of fun. 113 00:05:49,058 --> 00:05:51,894 It's Halloween. Loosen up a bit. 114 00:05:52,770 --> 00:05:56,023 It was on FX for seven seasons. 115 00:05:56,107 --> 00:05:59,026 It won countless Emmys. And a Peabody. 116 00:05:59,110 --> 00:06:01,320 I look exactly like her. 117 00:06:03,322 --> 00:06:05,867 Like Batman is so original. 118 00:06:14,167 --> 00:06:15,626 Hail Spartacus! 119 00:06:16,210 --> 00:06:18,171 I'd recognize those thighs anywhere. 120 00:06:19,922 --> 00:06:23,134 Straightest party ever. We're the only two gay guys here. 121 00:06:23,676 --> 00:06:25,094 Anthony, from the gym. 122 00:06:26,387 --> 00:06:28,014 Still can't place me? 123 00:06:28,681 --> 00:06:32,268 Imagine my hand surrounded by a lotta steam. 124 00:06:33,226 --> 00:06:34,562 This is my wife. 125 00:06:41,986 --> 00:06:44,614 Yeah, straight guy with abs like that. 126 00:06:51,871 --> 00:06:55,708 Are you really going to a hotel bar to look for men? 127 00:06:55,792 --> 00:06:58,753 Well, if you want a man in your life, 128 00:06:58,836 --> 00:07:02,215 ya can't just sit home and wait for him to come to you. 129 00:07:02,298 --> 00:07:05,009 All right, Helen Gurley Brown. 130 00:07:05,093 --> 00:07:08,096 Actually, that one was me. 131 00:07:27,740 --> 00:07:29,200 The British are coming. 132 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:33,788 - That's Paul Revere. - I know, 133 00:07:33,871 --> 00:07:35,766 but the founding father never said anything famous 134 00:07:35,790 --> 00:07:37,917 with the word "coming" in it, so 135 00:07:38,918 --> 00:07:40,002 just go with it. 136 00:07:42,296 --> 00:07:43,881 You look bizarrely hot. 137 00:07:47,468 --> 00:07:50,513 But before we get down to business, Mr. President, 138 00:07:50,596 --> 00:07:53,224 I know you're running for City Comptroller and all 139 00:07:53,307 --> 00:07:56,519 but you don't get to "comptroll" me. 140 00:07:58,146 --> 00:08:01,899 The message from the councilwoman on the comforter 141 00:08:02,734 --> 00:08:04,861 - is received. - You sure? 142 00:08:04,944 --> 00:08:06,154 Oh, yes. 143 00:08:06,571 --> 00:08:08,197 And I cannot tell a lie. 144 00:08:10,283 --> 00:08:11,534 Don't, don't touch my hair. 145 00:08:13,369 --> 00:08:14,954 Isn't that what you always say? 146 00:08:18,458 --> 00:08:20,710 Nobody can challenge him if he has the capability 147 00:08:20,793 --> 00:08:22,336 to launch America's nuclear arsenal. 148 00:08:23,212 --> 00:08:25,006 What more do you need? A written manifesto? 149 00:08:25,089 --> 00:08:28,259 This show is brilliant. Everyone's insane. 150 00:08:28,342 --> 00:08:31,095 Mom, Dad, you will not believe what just happened! 151 00:08:31,179 --> 00:08:32,448 Can it wait till after this scene? 152 00:08:32,472 --> 00:08:34,599 No. I was at the park and I landed an ollie 153 00:08:34,682 --> 00:08:36,808 and this cool guy came up to me and said I was awesome 154 00:08:36,893 --> 00:08:39,270 and wanted to know if I ever thought about modeling. 155 00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,063 What are you saying? What cool guy? 156 00:08:41,147 --> 00:08:42,690 At the park. He wants you to call him. 157 00:08:42,774 --> 00:08:44,942 We are not callin' some creep from the park. 158 00:08:45,026 --> 00:08:46,486 No, we certainly are not. 159 00:08:47,236 --> 00:08:48,154 Oh, my God. 160 00:08:48,237 --> 00:08:50,698 This is Ralph Lauren. 161 00:08:50,782 --> 00:08:52,492 This guy works for Ralph Lauren? 162 00:08:52,575 --> 00:08:54,094 You know who else works for Ralph Lauren? 163 00:08:54,118 --> 00:08:55,912 Me, as soon as I go to Kinko's 164 00:08:55,995 --> 00:08:57,705 and make a bunch of fake business cards. 165 00:08:57,789 --> 00:09:01,709 This is embossed with the Ralph Lauren logo. 166 00:09:01,793 --> 00:09:03,503 It's his real logo! 167 00:09:03,586 --> 00:09:05,546 Please, please, please, please can we call him? 168 00:09:05,630 --> 00:09:08,758 - It'd be so awesome! - It is a scam. 169 00:09:08,841 --> 00:09:10,652 You think some guy hangin' around a bunch of kids 170 00:09:10,676 --> 00:09:12,595 at a skate park is scoutin' models? 171 00:09:13,137 --> 00:09:16,391 Honey, this show has made you paranoid. 172 00:09:16,474 --> 00:09:18,309 What's the harm in calling? 173 00:09:18,393 --> 00:09:21,521 Because if this guy really works for Ralph Lauren, 174 00:09:21,604 --> 00:09:23,564 then he works for Ralph Lauren! 175 00:09:23,648 --> 00:09:24,565 Go, Mom! 176 00:09:24,649 --> 00:09:27,610 You know, in high school, I was a model at the mall. 177 00:09:27,693 --> 00:09:29,237 And guess who I wore? 178 00:09:29,320 --> 00:09:30,655 Ralph Lauren. 179 00:09:30,738 --> 00:09:32,782 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 180 00:09:34,367 --> 00:09:36,369 Last time I went to a bar to meet a man 181 00:09:37,120 --> 00:09:38,162 my phone folded. 182 00:09:39,372 --> 00:09:41,290 Last time I went to a bar to meet a man was 183 00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:44,502 never. 184 00:09:44,585 --> 00:09:45,878 - How is that possible? - What? 185 00:09:45,962 --> 00:09:48,673 Andre and I started dating when I was a junior in college 186 00:09:48,756 --> 00:09:51,134 and I met my high school boyfriend at Model U.N. 187 00:09:51,217 --> 00:09:53,678 Always wondered who did Model U.N. 188 00:09:53,761 --> 00:09:57,432 So, by my calculations, you've only seen two dicks. 189 00:09:57,515 --> 00:10:00,768 I saw more than that last time I was on the subway. 190 00:10:00,852 --> 00:10:02,812 Do those count? Well, then I've seen three. 191 00:10:03,730 --> 00:10:05,148 Can I ask how many you've seen? 192 00:10:05,231 --> 00:10:07,024 Enough that you can't surprise me. 193 00:10:07,775 --> 00:10:10,945 - Carrie? - Oh, I'm still surprise-able. 194 00:10:12,488 --> 00:10:16,284 Excuse me, ma'am, are you shocked this bar doesn't carry Nettle Field gin? 195 00:10:16,367 --> 00:10:18,661 No, I'm shocked that you are calling me "ma'am." 196 00:10:18,745 --> 00:10:21,748 Well, I was told that's how you address royalty. 197 00:10:23,374 --> 00:10:27,462 See, now, I'd buy you a Nettle Field gin martini but this bar doesn't carry it. 198 00:10:28,046 --> 00:10:31,674 Why do you keep saying "Nettle Field gin" as if it's a thing? 199 00:10:32,050 --> 00:10:34,510 I rep the brand. I'm trying to get into this hotel chain. 200 00:10:37,722 --> 00:10:39,557 Excuse me, bartender. 201 00:10:39,974 --> 00:10:42,560 Can I have a Nettle Field gin martini? 202 00:10:42,643 --> 00:10:44,520 I just told him, we don't carry that brand. 203 00:10:44,604 --> 00:10:46,898 Why not? I hear it's amazing. 204 00:10:50,193 --> 00:10:52,028 I owe you a bottle. 205 00:10:52,361 --> 00:10:53,529 Only one? 206 00:10:53,613 --> 00:10:56,491 Mama done hooked a fish. 207 00:11:00,078 --> 00:11:02,163 Oh, my God. 208 00:11:02,622 --> 00:11:03,498 Wait. 209 00:11:04,624 --> 00:11:06,876 Is this a bar or an aquarium? 210 00:11:06,959 --> 00:11:09,545 I think I just found my chocolate single. 211 00:11:09,629 --> 00:11:11,547 - Hi. - Evening. 212 00:11:11,631 --> 00:11:12,632 Hello. 213 00:11:15,009 --> 00:11:17,637 - My name is Ian. - Hi, Ian. 214 00:11:18,346 --> 00:11:21,182 May I buy you a drink? 215 00:11:21,808 --> 00:11:22,683 Sure. 216 00:11:26,729 --> 00:11:28,272 Well, perfect time for Wordle. 217 00:11:33,653 --> 00:11:36,697 You are very, very hot, your highness. 218 00:11:36,781 --> 00:11:38,783 Thank you. So are you. 219 00:11:44,414 --> 00:11:47,667 Look, I just wanna put this out there, it has nothing to do with you 220 00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:50,002 but, sometimes, I suffer from ED. 221 00:11:51,713 --> 00:11:53,339 Erectile dysfunction. 222 00:11:54,465 --> 00:11:55,341 Got it. 223 00:11:55,425 --> 00:11:58,803 I appreciate the sensitivity, but the way things are going tonight, 224 00:11:58,886 --> 00:12:01,472 I just don't think that's gonna be an issue. 225 00:12:04,392 --> 00:12:06,436 - So, we're cool? - Yeah, we're cool. 226 00:12:06,519 --> 00:12:07,937 We're cool. 227 00:12:09,689 --> 00:12:12,191 Some ladies are not cool with it. 228 00:12:13,860 --> 00:12:16,487 Well, I guess some women might feel a little insecure 229 00:12:16,571 --> 00:12:17,905 when... 230 00:12:29,959 --> 00:12:31,294 Only really takes a sec. 231 00:12:32,795 --> 00:12:34,630 - That's cool. - Okay. 232 00:12:38,134 --> 00:12:40,814 - Make this count. Last round, last round. - I can't, I'm too drunk! 233 00:12:42,013 --> 00:12:45,058 - Period! - I'm out of rolling papers. 234 00:12:45,141 --> 00:12:47,185 - Carry on without me. - Okay. Gimme a light. 235 00:12:47,268 --> 00:12:48,428 But just, like, keep it down. 236 00:12:50,146 --> 00:12:51,731 Somebody's asleep in the next room! 237 00:12:54,650 --> 00:12:57,236 Oh, shit. Fuck. 238 00:12:57,320 --> 00:12:59,238 It's okay. I'm awake. 239 00:12:59,322 --> 00:13:02,950 Oh, God. Why don't... Do you not have the earplugs in? 240 00:13:03,034 --> 00:13:04,368 They don't work. 241 00:13:05,369 --> 00:13:09,499 - What time is it? - It's 3:30. 242 00:13:09,582 --> 00:13:11,751 - Oh, my God! - I just go back to sleep. 243 00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:13,920 - I have to be up at five. - I am so sorry. 244 00:13:14,003 --> 00:13:16,756 I just need rolling papers, but we're gonna totally keep it down. 245 00:13:16,839 --> 00:13:18,716 Okay? Ow! Fuck! Shit! 246 00:13:20,551 --> 00:13:22,970 I'm gonna burn that fucking chair. 247 00:13:30,937 --> 00:13:32,647 Good morning. 248 00:13:43,741 --> 00:13:45,368 There she is. 249 00:13:45,451 --> 00:13:47,078 Sorry I had to cancel lunch. 250 00:13:47,161 --> 00:13:50,164 I got a late start today because that guy stayed over. 251 00:13:50,248 --> 00:13:52,083 Really, really? How was that? 252 00:13:52,166 --> 00:13:54,961 Let's just say I'm still surprise-able. 253 00:13:55,044 --> 00:13:57,672 - He had a penis pump. - What? 254 00:13:57,755 --> 00:13:59,775 - Bike lane! Bike lane! - He had to pump up his dick. 255 00:13:59,799 --> 00:14:00,925 Bike lane! Bike lane! 256 00:14:01,008 --> 00:14:02,927 - Bike lane! - Oh, my God! 257 00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:04,095 - Oh, my God! - Exactly! 258 00:14:04,178 --> 00:14:06,889 No, not you. Oh, my God, I have to go. 259 00:14:06,973 --> 00:14:08,599 I think I may have killed a man. 260 00:14:09,100 --> 00:14:11,060 You can't stop in the middle of a bike lane! 261 00:14:11,561 --> 00:14:13,146 Oh, my God! I know, I know, I know that. 262 00:14:13,229 --> 00:14:14,814 - I know. I'm so sorry. - Fuck. 263 00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:16,125 My friend was telling me something 264 00:14:16,149 --> 00:14:17,775 that literally stopped me in my tracks. 265 00:14:17,859 --> 00:14:20,319 Never, never mind. I'm so sorry. Are you okay? 266 00:14:20,403 --> 00:14:22,083 Do you want me to call an ambulance, maybe? 267 00:14:22,113 --> 00:14:22,989 No. 268 00:14:23,072 --> 00:14:24,282 - Here let me, let me... - God! 269 00:14:24,365 --> 00:14:25,950 Not my arm. 270 00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:28,494 - Sorry. I'm so sorry. - God. 271 00:14:28,578 --> 00:14:30,329 It's my wrist. 272 00:14:30,413 --> 00:14:32,540 - It might be sprained. At least I... - Really? 273 00:14:32,623 --> 00:14:35,418 I hope it's... Ow. I hope it's only sprained. 274 00:14:35,501 --> 00:14:37,837 Well, can I take you to an Urgent Care? 275 00:14:37,920 --> 00:14:41,132 'Cause I also... I think I heard a crack, and a crack is never good. 276 00:14:41,215 --> 00:14:43,676 - Probably just my helmet. - There's one on 14th Street. 277 00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:47,305 I know, because... Once I saw an Olsen twin go in there. 278 00:14:47,388 --> 00:14:50,391 I mean, that's why it, that's why it stuck in my mind, you know, 279 00:14:50,475 --> 00:14:54,979 because, like, what kind of Urgent Care on 14th Street 280 00:14:55,063 --> 00:14:57,315 would an Olsen twin need, you know? 281 00:14:57,398 --> 00:14:59,442 Do they live around here, you know? 282 00:14:59,525 --> 00:15:02,737 I'm sorry, I'm just... I'm so... I'm nervously talking 'cause I'm... 283 00:15:02,820 --> 00:15:05,740 Would you please... Can I please take you to the Urgent Care? 284 00:15:05,823 --> 00:15:10,536 All right, yeah, maybe 'cause my wrist is really starting to pound. 285 00:15:10,620 --> 00:15:12,080 Okay. 286 00:15:12,163 --> 00:15:15,583 - I'll get your bike for you. - Yeah, please. Oh, God. 287 00:15:16,959 --> 00:15:18,169 Here, just... 288 00:15:18,252 --> 00:15:21,214 I got it, I got it. Watch... I'm so sorry. 289 00:15:21,297 --> 00:15:24,425 I got a busy day, so I hope that they're quick. 290 00:15:24,509 --> 00:15:27,220 Well, I mean, "urgent" is in their name, so... 291 00:15:27,303 --> 00:15:28,471 Yeah, not in yours. 292 00:15:28,554 --> 00:15:31,265 No, sorry. We'll go this way. 293 00:15:31,349 --> 00:15:33,226 - I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. - Fuck. 294 00:15:33,309 --> 00:15:35,478 I never, ever... I'm not one of those people. 295 00:15:35,561 --> 00:15:38,523 I've lived here forever. I never stop in a bike lane. 296 00:15:38,940 --> 00:15:41,701 Hi, I know we're at the back of the line, but I heard him hit his head 297 00:15:41,734 --> 00:15:43,194 and I'm worried about a clot. 298 00:15:43,277 --> 00:15:45,947 Ma'am, we will get to you as soon as we can. I promise. 299 00:15:46,322 --> 00:15:47,240 No, I get it. I do. 300 00:15:47,323 --> 00:15:50,535 I just don't wanna be responsible for a clot. 301 00:15:50,993 --> 00:15:53,538 Ya know? I've gotta cover my bases. 302 00:15:53,621 --> 00:15:56,457 You wanna move it along? Go fill these out for your friend. 303 00:15:56,541 --> 00:15:58,960 Okay. Thank you. Will do. Thank you. 304 00:16:00,420 --> 00:16:04,507 Thank you. Shit, this is so not a good time for a broken wrist. 305 00:16:04,590 --> 00:16:07,260 Broken? What happened to a sprain? 306 00:16:07,343 --> 00:16:10,096 Well, it's kind of killing me to text, so... 307 00:16:11,139 --> 00:16:12,491 - Here. - Well, do you want me to help 308 00:16:12,515 --> 00:16:14,142 you fill these forms out? Yeah? 309 00:16:14,767 --> 00:16:17,186 - Oh, yeah. Thank you. - Okay. 310 00:16:17,270 --> 00:16:18,938 No problem. Of course. 311 00:16:19,021 --> 00:16:22,316 Okay, name and date of birth. 312 00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:24,193 George Campbell. 313 00:16:24,277 --> 00:16:27,029 George Campbell. C-A-M... 314 00:16:27,113 --> 00:16:28,698 - P-B-E-L-L. - P... E-L-L. 315 00:16:28,781 --> 00:16:29,741 - Yep. - Date of birth? 316 00:16:29,824 --> 00:16:32,493 10-17-68. 317 00:16:33,077 --> 00:16:34,370 Happy belated birthday. 318 00:16:35,538 --> 00:16:36,622 Address? 319 00:16:37,457 --> 00:16:39,500 - 245 East 29th. - Two... 320 00:16:40,043 --> 00:16:46,049 Really? Oh, my God, that's so funny. I'm 245 East 73rd Street. 321 00:16:46,132 --> 00:16:47,133 We're related. 322 00:16:48,384 --> 00:16:51,095 Okay, moving on to the tougher stuff. 323 00:16:52,180 --> 00:16:54,098 Emergency contact. 324 00:16:54,182 --> 00:16:55,475 My partner, Paul Bennett. 325 00:16:55,558 --> 00:16:58,561 - B-E-N-N-E-T-T. - Partner, gotcha. 326 00:16:59,771 --> 00:17:02,273 No, not husband partner. 327 00:17:03,357 --> 00:17:04,525 Business partner. 328 00:17:05,318 --> 00:17:07,195 Yeah. Never been married. 329 00:17:07,904 --> 00:17:08,780 Okay. 330 00:17:08,862 --> 00:17:10,238 Speak of the Devil. 331 00:17:11,532 --> 00:17:13,618 - Hi, Paul. - Man, where are you? 332 00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,578 The final version of that app deck is due... 333 00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:18,289 In two days. Believe me, I know. 334 00:17:18,372 --> 00:17:19,791 I am at Urgent Care, 335 00:17:19,873 --> 00:17:22,209 - so here. - No, this is urgent. Okay? 336 00:17:22,293 --> 00:17:25,088 We're running out of buyers. It's do or die! 337 00:17:25,170 --> 00:17:26,839 Yeah, all right, let me finish. 338 00:17:26,923 --> 00:17:32,762 I am here, stuck in whatever the opposite of a hit-and-run is. Meet Carrie. 339 00:17:33,221 --> 00:17:34,847 Hi, hi. 340 00:17:35,348 --> 00:17:38,309 Again, I'm mortified about this. 341 00:17:38,393 --> 00:17:40,603 I'll never get used to those bike lanes. 342 00:17:40,686 --> 00:17:43,940 They didn't have 'em when I came to New York in 1822. 343 00:17:44,023 --> 00:17:45,900 - George? - Sir, with the wrist? 344 00:17:45,983 --> 00:17:47,777 You can go back to exam room two. 345 00:17:47,860 --> 00:17:48,980 What is goin' on over there? 346 00:17:49,028 --> 00:17:50,028 Paul, I'll call you back. 347 00:17:51,823 --> 00:17:53,199 - Okay. - Do you need help with... 348 00:17:53,282 --> 00:17:55,451 Nah, I'm good. I'll just take this. 349 00:17:56,327 --> 00:17:58,204 - And I'll take that. - Yep. 350 00:17:58,287 --> 00:18:00,790 And thank you. 351 00:18:00,873 --> 00:18:02,542 - Of course. Yeah. - Yeah. 352 00:18:02,625 --> 00:18:03,793 I'll say hi to the Olsens. 353 00:18:06,671 --> 00:18:09,632 - I'm home! - Hi, Dad! 354 00:18:10,174 --> 00:18:12,301 Whoa! Rock is helpin' to make dinner. 355 00:18:13,219 --> 00:18:14,859 What? Did I come home to the wrong house? 356 00:18:15,596 --> 00:18:17,223 What is this Norman Rockwell scene here? 357 00:18:17,306 --> 00:18:19,892 Honey, we have been doing some more research 358 00:18:19,976 --> 00:18:21,519 on the Ralph Lauren shoot. 359 00:18:21,602 --> 00:18:24,188 Honey, absolutely not. 360 00:18:24,981 --> 00:18:28,025 I'm just... I'm really... I'm smellin' a "Taken" type 361 00:18:28,109 --> 00:18:30,695 kidnapping vibe here, and I just... 362 00:18:31,154 --> 00:18:32,947 I don't have the muscle mass to rescue Rock 363 00:18:33,030 --> 00:18:34,824 from a compound in Belize. 364 00:18:34,907 --> 00:18:36,534 Dad, it's not a kidnapping vibe. 365 00:18:36,617 --> 00:18:38,870 We Zoomed with the advertising team 366 00:18:38,953 --> 00:18:42,707 and it's actually quite legitimate and impressive. 367 00:18:42,790 --> 00:18:48,004 It is a progressive family concept and Rock will be wearing a Polo shirt, 368 00:18:48,087 --> 00:18:51,799 exactly what I wore as a teen model! 369 00:18:51,883 --> 00:18:54,177 Teen model. Next stop, rehab. 370 00:18:54,260 --> 00:18:57,430 - Mom's not a junkie. - That's right! I'm not. 371 00:18:57,513 --> 00:19:00,516 Harry, you are being ridiculous. 372 00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:05,021 Rock really wants to do this and they've come up with a great idea 373 00:19:05,104 --> 00:19:07,190 of how they would spend the money they would make. 374 00:19:07,273 --> 00:19:09,317 Plant some trees in Israel! 375 00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:16,074 Look, even if it is legit, it's gonna be exploitative. 376 00:19:16,157 --> 00:19:17,593 The next thing ya know, they're gonna be 377 00:19:17,617 --> 00:19:19,911 usin' Rock's likeness in God knows what kinda ad. 378 00:19:19,994 --> 00:19:23,039 Harry, this is a Polo campaign. 379 00:19:23,122 --> 00:19:25,958 - What could they do? - Dad, I hear you. 380 00:19:26,042 --> 00:19:28,378 So you don't have to come 'cause Mom's gonna take me. 381 00:19:29,087 --> 00:19:30,630 It'll be awesome. 382 00:19:32,006 --> 00:19:33,424 Slippery slope. 383 00:19:35,385 --> 00:19:38,262 I don't know why they call this place Urgent Care. 384 00:19:38,346 --> 00:19:40,266 It should be called "I Hope You Have Nothing Else 385 00:19:40,348 --> 00:19:42,225 Planned for the Rest of the Day" Care. 386 00:19:42,308 --> 00:19:43,684 Why are you still there? 387 00:19:43,768 --> 00:19:46,938 Because I made the mistake of telling him my name, 388 00:19:47,021 --> 00:19:48,731 so now I'm implicated. 389 00:19:48,815 --> 00:19:51,984 I don't wanna get sued. I'm Google-able. 390 00:19:52,068 --> 00:19:54,821 And, you know, the poor guy can't type. 391 00:19:54,904 --> 00:19:59,534 He's got this big sales presentation in two days 392 00:19:59,617 --> 00:20:03,788 and it's all about an app he's desperate to sell. At his age? 393 00:20:03,871 --> 00:20:05,790 I mean, oh, God. 394 00:20:05,873 --> 00:20:08,960 I just hope I didn't ruin his big chance. 395 00:20:09,043 --> 00:20:10,628 Maybe I should just write him a check. 396 00:20:10,712 --> 00:20:13,214 You're a pushover, like me. 397 00:20:14,090 --> 00:20:16,175 Since when are you a pushover? 398 00:20:16,259 --> 00:20:20,596 Since last night. I told pump gin guy I'd see him again. 399 00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:23,641 - Seriously? - Dating at this age, 400 00:20:23,725 --> 00:20:25,351 there's always something. 401 00:20:25,435 --> 00:20:29,480 We had 30 minutes of great foreplay, 402 00:20:29,564 --> 00:20:33,443 a bizarre intermission, followed by B-plus sex. 403 00:20:33,526 --> 00:20:35,087 Well, what are you gonna do if he doesn't bring it? 404 00:20:35,111 --> 00:20:37,697 You gonna swap in the pump you use for your yoga ball? 405 00:20:37,780 --> 00:20:41,909 With most of these guys, I have to get myself off anyway at the end. 406 00:20:41,993 --> 00:20:46,497 And at least with him, I had some laughs and a sexy spoon after. 407 00:20:46,914 --> 00:20:47,915 'Kay, gotta go. Bye. 408 00:20:50,543 --> 00:20:53,671 You're still here? Waiting for a total stranger? 409 00:20:53,755 --> 00:20:55,923 - That is very cool. - How's the wrist feeling? 410 00:20:56,007 --> 00:20:57,884 - It's pretty good. - Oh, great. 411 00:20:57,967 --> 00:20:59,820 Great, I just wanted to make sure it wasn't broken. 412 00:20:59,844 --> 00:21:03,556 Oh, yeah, no. It's definitely broken. 413 00:21:04,348 --> 00:21:06,434 That must have been the opioids talking. 414 00:21:06,517 --> 00:21:08,061 Sir, the card ya gave us 415 00:21:08,144 --> 00:21:10,271 earlier to put on file was declined. 416 00:21:10,354 --> 00:21:13,316 Oh, right. Shit, that one's no good. 417 00:21:14,442 --> 00:21:18,613 Yeah, here. Sorry, this one. 418 00:21:23,618 --> 00:21:26,454 Actually, sorry. Do that one. 419 00:21:26,537 --> 00:21:27,455 Sorry, yeah. 420 00:21:27,538 --> 00:21:29,540 It was so great. 421 00:21:29,624 --> 00:21:33,753 I felt like everyone on the street was giving me that "you just had sex" eye. 422 00:21:33,836 --> 00:21:36,255 I love you having a hot walk of shame. 423 00:21:36,339 --> 00:21:40,843 I mean, I get it now. These one-night stands are amazing! 424 00:21:40,927 --> 00:21:41,987 Afternoon, Professor Wallace. 425 00:21:42,011 --> 00:21:43,471 Good afternoon, ladies. 426 00:21:46,474 --> 00:21:49,644 We did it all night long 427 00:21:49,727 --> 00:21:52,397 and then, I got up, got dressed, went home, 428 00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:55,024 and slept in my own bed until two. 429 00:21:55,108 --> 00:21:58,361 Jealous. Not of the sex, of the sleep. 430 00:21:59,237 --> 00:22:02,657 - What? - I'm early mornings, Che's late nights. 431 00:22:02,740 --> 00:22:05,618 I would only sleep there on the weekends when we could stay in bed, 432 00:22:05,701 --> 00:22:08,246 if I had literally anywhere else to go. 433 00:22:11,457 --> 00:22:13,459 You do. Andre's music room is empty. 434 00:22:13,543 --> 00:22:16,212 Crash there until Steve finds a new place. 435 00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:19,382 That's an incredible offer! 436 00:22:19,465 --> 00:22:22,343 But you don't really mean that. You're just being nice. 437 00:22:22,427 --> 00:22:24,137 I'm not nice, and I do mean it. 438 00:22:24,220 --> 00:22:27,098 Miranda, I don't really like living alone. 439 00:22:27,181 --> 00:22:29,021 And you can't keep going from Che's to Brooklyn 440 00:22:29,100 --> 00:22:30,852 - at five in the morning. - I can't. 441 00:22:30,935 --> 00:22:33,479 I'm exhausted, and I look it. 442 00:22:33,563 --> 00:22:34,772 You do. 443 00:22:38,192 --> 00:22:39,736 I told you I'm not nice. 444 00:22:47,034 --> 00:22:48,161 Yes? 445 00:22:50,747 --> 00:22:53,499 If this is George Campbell, this is, 446 00:22:53,583 --> 00:22:56,085 this is your near-assassin, Carrie Bradshaw. 447 00:22:57,253 --> 00:22:58,463 Come on in. 448 00:22:59,589 --> 00:23:01,007 Thank you. 449 00:23:13,561 --> 00:23:14,771 Hello? 450 00:23:21,277 --> 00:23:22,195 Hi there. 451 00:23:23,196 --> 00:23:24,572 - Hey. - You again? 452 00:23:26,199 --> 00:23:30,119 Do you live here, or are you temping for an art gallery? 453 00:23:30,203 --> 00:23:32,955 Nope, I live here. 454 00:23:33,039 --> 00:23:34,457 Oh, my. 455 00:23:34,957 --> 00:23:39,212 Was it previously a train station? Or... 456 00:23:39,629 --> 00:23:42,715 - an airplane hangar? - What a nice surprise. 457 00:23:43,466 --> 00:23:45,676 Unless you're here to break my other wrist? 458 00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:47,678 No, no, no, no, no. No, I come in peace. 459 00:23:48,805 --> 00:23:51,474 Well, actually, it's guilt. 460 00:23:51,557 --> 00:23:56,938 And to offer lunch and my intact wrists to help with your big presentation, 461 00:23:57,021 --> 00:23:58,523 if that's not weird. 462 00:23:59,565 --> 00:24:01,192 It's definitely weird. 463 00:24:01,859 --> 00:24:04,070 - Okay. - But I can... I will 464 00:24:04,153 --> 00:24:07,156 take your help because I just ran out of Percocet. 465 00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:08,908 Oh, no. 466 00:24:09,409 --> 00:24:12,245 So, I assume you are proficient in Python? 467 00:24:13,121 --> 00:24:15,456 I type 92 words a minute. 468 00:24:17,917 --> 00:24:20,253 Carrot Ginger, Matzo Ball, and Pea. 469 00:24:20,336 --> 00:24:22,797 There's enough food here for a week. 470 00:24:23,423 --> 00:24:26,175 Who has three different soups for lunch? 471 00:24:26,259 --> 00:24:29,220 - I was thinking maybe you could freeze it. - What? 472 00:24:30,596 --> 00:24:32,640 I don't know when your last meal was. 473 00:24:33,349 --> 00:24:36,602 - Do I look like I'm starving? - No. 474 00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:39,272 You know, just 'cause I'm not married 475 00:24:39,355 --> 00:24:42,275 doesn't mean that I don't know how to cook or order in. 476 00:24:42,358 --> 00:24:44,360 No, it wasn't that. 477 00:24:44,444 --> 00:24:50,158 I just thought that perhaps you were in a bit of a bind. 478 00:24:51,242 --> 00:24:55,872 Because, you know, the frantic, last-chance business call 479 00:24:55,955 --> 00:24:59,041 and then the credit card situation. 480 00:25:00,710 --> 00:25:04,422 Okay, so, that credit card was closed out 'cause of fraud 481 00:25:05,298 --> 00:25:08,760 and Paul and I have just put way too much time into that app 482 00:25:08,843 --> 00:25:10,720 to see it go down the tubes. 483 00:25:10,803 --> 00:25:13,556 You know, we've been hustling in the tech space since college. 484 00:25:14,057 --> 00:25:18,686 Beer pong to all this. It's impressive. 485 00:25:18,770 --> 00:25:21,564 Yeah, we've sold three apps. 486 00:25:22,398 --> 00:25:27,612 Hopefully, four if you and I can ever get down to work. 487 00:25:27,695 --> 00:25:30,114 - My wrists are all yours. - Thank you. 488 00:25:31,949 --> 00:25:34,035 - Okay. - Here, hold on, let me just... 489 00:25:34,118 --> 00:25:35,244 Just gotta wake it up. 490 00:25:40,708 --> 00:25:42,168 Tiny wrists. 491 00:25:45,713 --> 00:25:46,923 That okay? 492 00:26:11,656 --> 00:26:15,993 Dude, fuckin' hang a towel on the door if you got company. 493 00:26:17,161 --> 00:26:19,038 Yeah, no, and I thought we used a sock. 494 00:26:19,122 --> 00:26:21,082 Not time for comedy. 495 00:26:21,916 --> 00:26:23,459 Your dry cleaner called me again. 496 00:26:23,543 --> 00:26:24,836 This has been there a month. 497 00:26:25,753 --> 00:26:29,382 Anyway, Paul, this is Carrie. 498 00:26:30,758 --> 00:26:33,720 - FaceTime from Urgent C... - Oh, yeah, yeah. Hi. 499 00:26:34,178 --> 00:26:36,098 Yeah, she's helping me out with my mangled wrist. 500 00:26:36,180 --> 00:26:39,851 Not what it looks like. We're on a deadline, bro. 501 00:26:40,435 --> 00:26:41,769 It's game time. 502 00:26:47,734 --> 00:26:49,569 Well, I should 503 00:26:50,528 --> 00:26:53,531 probably take my tiny wrists and go. 504 00:26:54,449 --> 00:26:57,452 It's rush hour. Can I borrow a bike? 505 00:26:58,077 --> 00:26:59,912 Yeah, sure. 506 00:27:04,292 --> 00:27:05,418 Never gonna happen. 507 00:27:06,252 --> 00:27:09,172 I take cabs. Enjoy the soups. 508 00:27:09,255 --> 00:27:13,718 ABC is, like, so excited. And my agent's flying in for the testing, 509 00:27:13,801 --> 00:27:15,553 which is apparently a good sign. 510 00:27:18,222 --> 00:27:20,349 This red curry is not a joke. 511 00:27:21,184 --> 00:27:23,245 You know that's what happens when you order something spicy. 512 00:27:23,269 --> 00:27:26,856 Yes, but I needed something to wake me up. 513 00:27:27,690 --> 00:27:32,528 I am awake, so please, go on. What is testing? 514 00:27:32,612 --> 00:27:35,406 So they ask a bunch of randos that they find in Times Square 515 00:27:35,490 --> 00:27:37,700 to give feedback on my pilot. 516 00:27:37,784 --> 00:27:41,662 I guess it helps them figure out how to best market the show to America. 517 00:27:41,746 --> 00:27:42,705 Thank you. 518 00:27:47,251 --> 00:27:48,336 Okay. 519 00:27:50,088 --> 00:27:51,047 So 520 00:27:52,173 --> 00:27:54,217 If my body survives this meal... 521 00:27:55,343 --> 00:27:58,554 I'm thinking I may move into Nya's spare room. 522 00:27:59,806 --> 00:28:02,558 Sometimes, I feel like I'm cramping your style. 523 00:28:03,226 --> 00:28:05,686 Meaning my loud-ass friends are keeping you awake all night? 524 00:28:05,770 --> 00:28:06,854 Yes. 525 00:28:06,938 --> 00:28:10,108 And my crazy-ass schedule is keeping you awake all morning. 526 00:28:10,191 --> 00:28:11,471 Is that right? I hadn't noticed. 527 00:28:12,151 --> 00:28:14,237 Plus, Nya's place is, like, 528 00:28:14,320 --> 00:28:16,656 - two minutes away from my house. - Yeah. 529 00:28:16,739 --> 00:28:18,866 I love having ya there, but whatever works 530 00:28:18,950 --> 00:28:20,576 best for you is what I want. 531 00:28:20,660 --> 00:28:23,996 And I'm still gonna sleep over plenty of nights. 532 00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:24,997 Don't worry. 533 00:28:26,207 --> 00:28:27,792 The only thing I'm worried about 534 00:28:28,251 --> 00:28:29,544 is that spice all over your lips 535 00:28:29,627 --> 00:28:31,963 'cause I'm not tryna have curry-lingus later. 536 00:28:33,172 --> 00:28:38,594 Look, honey. Oh my, look at how professional! 537 00:28:38,678 --> 00:28:40,346 I am so proud of you. 538 00:28:40,430 --> 00:28:41,806 I haven't even done anything yet. 539 00:28:41,889 --> 00:28:43,558 That's okay. It's already amazing. 540 00:28:43,641 --> 00:28:46,561 Hey, Rock. I'm Bee. I'll be your stylist today. 541 00:28:46,644 --> 00:28:47,770 Hi. Nice to meet you. 542 00:28:47,854 --> 00:28:49,856 - This is my mom. - Hi. I'm Charlotte. 543 00:28:49,939 --> 00:28:53,860 - Are you wearing all vintage Ralph? - Head to toe! 544 00:28:53,943 --> 00:28:56,571 I've been wearing him since I was a teen model. 545 00:28:58,364 --> 00:28:59,699 Right this way. 546 00:28:59,782 --> 00:29:02,076 Sorry, "model" just came out. 547 00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:04,096 Thank you so much for asking me to be here, honey. 548 00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:06,706 - It means a lot. - I'm so glad you can be here with me. 549 00:29:06,789 --> 00:29:07,749 Chin up! 550 00:29:07,832 --> 00:29:11,044 So, how are you feelin' about the whole roommate situation? 551 00:29:11,127 --> 00:29:12,003 Great! 552 00:29:12,503 --> 00:29:13,963 We're both going through divorces, 553 00:29:14,047 --> 00:29:16,549 so we'll be like an angry Laverne and Shirley. 554 00:29:17,717 --> 00:29:20,219 Okay, the room is very small 555 00:29:20,303 --> 00:29:23,181 so if ya see a single bed that looks like it won't fall apart 556 00:29:23,264 --> 00:29:26,893 before Steve finds a new place, throw yourself on it. 557 00:29:27,518 --> 00:29:29,020 Well, it's been a couple months. 558 00:29:29,103 --> 00:29:31,355 How long will that be, exactly? 559 00:29:31,439 --> 00:29:33,691 I don't feel I can ask him. 560 00:29:33,775 --> 00:29:37,111 I don't feel like I'm allowed to ask anything right now. 561 00:29:37,195 --> 00:29:42,283 Except to ask me to sit on someone else's used mattress? 562 00:29:43,076 --> 00:29:45,745 These single beds look so sad. 563 00:29:45,828 --> 00:29:48,539 Well, look closer, 'cause maybe they're not. 564 00:29:48,623 --> 00:29:50,291 Case in point, 565 00:29:50,374 --> 00:29:53,836 the single man I'm having dinner with tonight. 566 00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:57,924 I heard "partner," I thought "gay." I heard "crash," I thought "lawsuit." 567 00:29:58,007 --> 00:30:00,468 I heard "Urgent Care," I thought, "This'll be quick." 568 00:30:00,551 --> 00:30:05,598 I got everything wrong. No more snap judgments. 569 00:30:05,681 --> 00:30:08,184 So you're saying you think I should take this one? 570 00:30:08,267 --> 00:30:13,064 Absolutely not. I see that mattress, I think "bedbugs." 571 00:30:14,357 --> 00:30:16,359 Rock, that's great! 572 00:30:17,360 --> 00:30:18,778 There we go! 573 00:30:19,237 --> 00:30:21,906 All right, Rock, turn around. 574 00:30:22,407 --> 00:30:24,367 Big smile, big smile! Lots of energy. 575 00:30:26,786 --> 00:30:28,663 All right, eyes wide. 576 00:30:29,247 --> 00:30:31,207 That was perfect, that was perfect. 577 00:30:34,419 --> 00:30:36,713 Yo, dude, what's happenin'? 578 00:30:36,796 --> 00:30:38,396 - What's good, man? - You're crushin' it. 579 00:30:38,464 --> 00:30:40,466 Dude, this is a dope shoot. 580 00:30:40,550 --> 00:30:42,802 What's gonna be on that green screen, yo? 581 00:30:42,885 --> 00:30:45,680 Like somethin' dirty or sexy or what? 582 00:30:45,763 --> 00:30:47,849 All right, let's keep that head down. 583 00:30:47,932 --> 00:30:51,477 I don't know, bro, but this is a family scene. 584 00:30:52,145 --> 00:30:53,771 There's kids here. 585 00:30:55,898 --> 00:30:59,026 Big smile, big smile! There we go! 586 00:30:59,110 --> 00:31:00,129 Excellent, Rock. Just like that. 587 00:31:00,153 --> 00:31:03,614 Dude, you better get outta here right now 588 00:31:03,698 --> 00:31:06,200 - before Rock sees you. - All right, another one right here. 589 00:31:06,284 --> 00:31:09,454 Baby, there's just somethin' about this whole situation 590 00:31:09,537 --> 00:31:11,289 that does not sit right with me. 591 00:31:11,372 --> 00:31:16,627 Could it be that I am the fun parent and you are the heavy for a change? 592 00:31:19,005 --> 00:31:19,964 Maybe. 593 00:31:20,048 --> 00:31:22,276 - Look at that one right there! - If you don't get outta here 594 00:31:22,300 --> 00:31:24,302 before that kid sees you, 595 00:31:24,385 --> 00:31:27,138 all trust will be broken 596 00:31:27,221 --> 00:31:30,058 and you will never be "fun dad" ever again. 597 00:31:30,141 --> 00:31:32,268 - Good point. - Here we are! 598 00:31:32,351 --> 00:31:34,479 - Later, dude. - All right, big smile. 599 00:31:34,562 --> 00:31:36,439 I thought you were returning that hair. 600 00:31:36,522 --> 00:31:39,108 - Carrie likes it. - Over your right shoulder, right shoulder. 601 00:31:39,192 --> 00:31:41,444 And I lost the receipt. 602 00:31:41,527 --> 00:31:43,488 - Peace out. - There it is... Hat off. 603 00:31:45,907 --> 00:31:47,947 Look away like you're too cool, too cool for school. 604 00:31:50,536 --> 00:31:52,330 That's great, Rock. Just like that. 605 00:31:54,290 --> 00:31:57,126 That scene with the apron was funny. 606 00:31:57,210 --> 00:32:02,965 Okay. Wow, so we love, we loved Che's dad. 607 00:32:03,049 --> 00:32:06,803 Any other positive feedback on the character played by Tony Danza? 608 00:32:07,512 --> 00:32:10,348 - Yeah. - Great head of hair. So lush. 609 00:32:11,808 --> 00:32:12,809 Everybody loves Tony. 610 00:32:12,892 --> 00:32:15,520 Negatives about our dad character? 611 00:32:15,937 --> 00:32:19,941 He looked uncomfortable in that scene when she cried. 612 00:32:20,024 --> 00:32:22,193 When "they," "they" cried. 613 00:32:22,860 --> 00:32:25,488 Right, sorry. 614 00:32:26,155 --> 00:32:29,784 The crying sends a signal that it's sad to be non-binary. 615 00:32:30,284 --> 00:32:32,161 That is what I said! 616 00:32:32,245 --> 00:32:34,205 I knew the scene was too much and I told 'em that. 617 00:32:34,288 --> 00:32:35,832 I told 'em that repeatedly. 618 00:32:35,915 --> 00:32:37,750 - Repeatedly. - Okay. We have that note. 619 00:32:37,834 --> 00:32:39,335 You've been pretty quiet. 620 00:32:39,419 --> 00:32:41,087 Can we hear some more from you? 621 00:32:41,170 --> 00:32:42,213 Me? 622 00:32:43,756 --> 00:32:49,053 I mean, the whole "Che" character was like a walking boomer joke 623 00:32:49,137 --> 00:32:50,763 that felt so fake to me. 624 00:32:51,556 --> 00:32:56,227 Just some phony, sanitized, performative, 625 00:32:56,310 --> 00:32:59,313 cheesy-ass, dad joke, 626 00:33:00,398 --> 00:33:05,027 bullshit version of what the non-binary experience is. 627 00:33:05,987 --> 00:33:07,363 It sucked. 628 00:33:10,241 --> 00:33:13,953 Also, they would not be able to afford an apartment that big in Bushwick. 629 00:33:15,913 --> 00:33:18,624 Did anyone else have anything negative to say 630 00:33:18,708 --> 00:33:21,335 about the character of Che, played by Che Diaz? 631 00:33:25,757 --> 00:33:27,842 Okay, looks like we got a Yahtzee. 632 00:33:29,677 --> 00:33:31,804 Everybody thinks of TV today 633 00:33:31,888 --> 00:33:34,932 as a place where artistic people get to be creative. 634 00:33:35,016 --> 00:33:38,186 But the truth is, they just care about selling soap. 635 00:33:38,269 --> 00:33:44,484 TV is just a corporate conglomerate, and those corporate assholes can eat shit. 636 00:33:44,567 --> 00:33:47,487 It's just like corporate law. They will never get it. 637 00:33:47,570 --> 00:33:50,615 And I'm sorry, Times Square tourists? 638 00:33:50,698 --> 00:33:53,076 They can't possibly understand your story. 639 00:33:54,452 --> 00:33:56,704 A genderqueer person from Brooklyn tanked it. 640 00:33:56,788 --> 00:33:58,956 That call came from inside the house. 641 00:33:59,040 --> 00:34:01,000 Well, they can eat shit, too then. 642 00:34:01,084 --> 00:34:04,670 And ABC was like, "If that demographic doesn't like Che..." 643 00:34:04,754 --> 00:34:07,799 ABC can eat shit! ABC can eat shit and die! 644 00:34:07,882 --> 00:34:10,468 Stop telling everybody to eat shit. It's not helping. 645 00:34:10,550 --> 00:34:11,552 Sorry. 646 00:34:12,762 --> 00:34:14,639 How am I gonna afford this apartment? 647 00:34:15,890 --> 00:34:17,767 I was counting on that TV money. 648 00:34:17,849 --> 00:34:21,561 Okay, so you'll make another show. 649 00:34:22,271 --> 00:34:24,524 You'll make an even better show. 650 00:34:24,606 --> 00:34:26,317 Yeah, doesn't work that way. 651 00:34:26,401 --> 00:34:30,570 You mean it didn't before now, but you're you. 652 00:34:30,655 --> 00:34:32,949 There is nobody like you. 653 00:34:33,615 --> 00:34:38,496 You just have to suck it up and pull yourself outta this. 654 00:34:38,579 --> 00:34:41,082 - I'll be your cheerleader. - Oh, Miranda, stop. 655 00:34:41,164 --> 00:34:42,791 - Let's go! Let's go! - Stop. 656 00:34:42,874 --> 00:34:45,878 - Miranda, stop. Stop, stop! - Let's go! 657 00:34:45,961 --> 00:34:48,588 I don't need a cheerleader! This isn't a game, this is my life! 658 00:34:48,673 --> 00:34:52,050 This is my career! This is my identity! 659 00:34:52,135 --> 00:34:54,262 It took me 46 years to figure out who I am 660 00:34:54,345 --> 00:34:57,849 and then a focus group one hour to fuckin' destroy me! 661 00:34:57,932 --> 00:35:00,184 So, I don't need to be all Tony Robbins'd right now. 662 00:35:00,268 --> 00:35:01,310 I got it. 663 00:35:02,562 --> 00:35:03,438 So, what can I do? 664 00:35:03,521 --> 00:35:05,356 I don't... Nothing. 665 00:35:06,065 --> 00:35:07,525 I'm a mess. 666 00:35:10,027 --> 00:35:11,738 I just need some space. 667 00:35:14,157 --> 00:35:16,367 Would you mind staying the night at your other place? 668 00:35:18,828 --> 00:35:21,831 Sure. Of course. 669 00:35:23,833 --> 00:35:26,461 Can I hug you before I go? 670 00:35:37,555 --> 00:35:38,556 Okay. 671 00:35:40,808 --> 00:35:42,435 So, I'll see ya tomorrow. 672 00:35:42,894 --> 00:35:45,396 You know, honestly, I think I just need a bit... 673 00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:48,107 A few more days alone. 674 00:35:49,233 --> 00:35:50,526 Is that okay? 675 00:35:51,402 --> 00:35:53,029 Yeah, sure. 676 00:36:21,432 --> 00:36:22,725 My... 677 00:36:27,647 --> 00:36:29,190 That was great. 678 00:36:42,412 --> 00:36:43,830 That's not cool. 679 00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:47,917 Are you for real right now? 680 00:36:49,961 --> 00:36:50,837 Sir, 681 00:36:50,920 --> 00:36:54,298 do you seriously have the balls to say something about my device 682 00:36:54,382 --> 00:36:56,926 when I wake up to your freshly washed penis pump 683 00:36:57,009 --> 00:36:59,095 - drying in my dish rack? - That's different. 684 00:36:59,178 --> 00:37:01,178 That was just to get us started. This is so like... 685 00:37:02,348 --> 00:37:03,391 So noisy. 686 00:37:04,225 --> 00:37:06,936 I'm sorry if I'm bothering the man whose penis pump goes 687 00:37:08,020 --> 00:37:09,313 in the middle of my bedroom. 688 00:37:17,280 --> 00:37:18,489 Not cool. 689 00:37:20,533 --> 00:37:22,160 So not cool. 690 00:37:35,089 --> 00:37:36,340 Seriously? 691 00:37:37,133 --> 00:37:38,885 Not cool! 692 00:37:55,693 --> 00:37:56,569 Look at you. 693 00:37:58,279 --> 00:38:01,199 - Little help here? - Sorry. No, I'm sorry. 694 00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:05,286 They're tiny tender buttons. 695 00:38:16,214 --> 00:38:20,426 Here wait one second. That's probably Paul. 696 00:38:21,135 --> 00:38:22,345 I just need to get this. 697 00:38:22,428 --> 00:38:24,764 - Sure. - Give me one second. 698 00:38:26,599 --> 00:38:29,394 - Dude, what is up? - Dude, where's the final deck? 699 00:38:29,477 --> 00:38:31,479 I messengered it to you. 700 00:38:31,938 --> 00:38:34,607 I have no final deck. 701 00:38:34,690 --> 00:38:38,903 Fuck. Fuck! Fuck, I forgot to send it. 702 00:38:39,195 --> 00:38:43,866 I'm gonna call my assistant and have him come pick it up ASAP, okay? 703 00:38:43,950 --> 00:38:45,952 - Are you with her right now? - Yeah, I'm... 704 00:38:46,035 --> 00:38:49,080 - Seriously, dude? - With her, but that is not relevant. 705 00:38:49,163 --> 00:38:50,456 Hey, it's not not relevant! 706 00:38:50,540 --> 00:38:53,584 I will get this to you pronto, and my head is totally in the game. 707 00:38:54,210 --> 00:38:55,378 - I'll be right back. - Okay. 708 00:38:55,461 --> 00:38:56,963 Goddammit! 709 00:38:57,046 --> 00:38:58,965 Just stop, all right? 710 00:38:59,048 --> 00:39:00,049 God. 711 00:39:05,012 --> 00:39:08,099 Look, it's nothing against you. 712 00:39:09,517 --> 00:39:10,935 Is it Carrie? 713 00:39:14,272 --> 00:39:15,898 Can you hear me? 714 00:39:15,982 --> 00:39:17,191 Yeah? 715 00:39:19,444 --> 00:39:22,530 Okay, I'm sorry about all this. 716 00:39:22,613 --> 00:39:26,659 Honestly, it's just... It's been a few bumpy years. 717 00:39:26,743 --> 00:39:29,704 You know, he's creative and I'm business 718 00:39:29,787 --> 00:39:36,377 and sometimes I have to push just to get him across that finish line 719 00:39:36,461 --> 00:39:37,587 which 720 00:39:38,379 --> 00:39:40,882 I guess it ends up making me look like the bad guy 721 00:39:40,965 --> 00:39:43,968 and a piece of shit, and I'm not. 722 00:39:44,469 --> 00:39:48,598 I've been in this game for 20-something years now 723 00:39:48,681 --> 00:39:52,143 and you know, I feel like he's been just, kind of, 724 00:39:52,226 --> 00:39:56,397 falling off a little bit, like, "Oh, you know, I'm just gonna give 70%," 725 00:39:56,481 --> 00:39:59,108 like, that's cool. It's not fucking cool. 726 00:40:00,318 --> 00:40:02,320 I'm fucking frustrated, Carrie. 727 00:40:02,779 --> 00:40:03,988 George? 728 00:40:09,327 --> 00:40:12,080 - George? - Be right there! 729 00:40:12,163 --> 00:40:14,123 Just gotta get this deck together! 730 00:40:15,666 --> 00:40:16,876 Hey. 731 00:40:17,460 --> 00:40:22,799 Hey, listen, I'm gonna go! He's upset. 732 00:40:22,882 --> 00:40:25,426 Paul's great. I don't want you to think he's a jerk. 733 00:40:25,510 --> 00:40:29,972 It's just this sale's a big deal for us, and it's stressful as hell. 734 00:40:31,474 --> 00:40:34,894 You know how on your form I checked "single"? 735 00:40:35,853 --> 00:40:38,481 Well, I think you actually are married 736 00:40:39,482 --> 00:40:41,067 to Paul. 737 00:40:41,150 --> 00:40:44,320 He's not just your business partner, he's your wife. 738 00:40:44,404 --> 00:40:48,574 No, no, it's not like that. We're more Lennon and McCartney. 739 00:40:49,909 --> 00:40:55,540 Well, that kinda makes me Yoko, so, I'm gonna go. 740 00:40:56,332 --> 00:41:00,294 - You sure? - Yep! Leaving! 741 00:41:00,378 --> 00:41:04,382 I wish you a long and happy marriage. 742 00:41:16,144 --> 00:41:17,061 Carrie? 743 00:41:25,862 --> 00:41:29,907 And just like that, George and I were over. 744 00:41:29,991 --> 00:41:33,327 But at least I got back up on the bike.